Need a spell to get your ex back? Learn how to work reconciliation spells the right way, to return a lost lover and bring your ex back - The Undefined Witch

Spell To Get Your Ex Back – The Truth About Reconciliation Spells

Dear Tuesday,

I’ve just found out I’m pregnant, and my boyfriend of 16 years has left me for another woman… what is a spell to get your ex back?


Dear Tuesday,

Do you have a spell to get your ex back? After 10 years in a relationship, my girlfriend has just got engaged to a woman she’s been seeing behind my back…


Dear Tuesday,

My husband is having an affair but refuses to leave either of us… do reconciliation spells help in this situation?


Dear Tuesday,

How can I make my girlfriend fall back in love with me after cheating on me with my best mate… I’m looking for a spell to get your ex back.


Dear Tuesday,

What are some reconciliation spells to make my wife stay faithful…


Dear Tuesday,

My partner has cheated on me 7 times now, do reconciliation spells make it stop…


Looking to perform an in depth reconciliation spell? Why not save yourself the hassle of hunting down all of the bits and pieces and get yourself a ready to use spell kit HERE

A Spell To Get Your Ex Back: Reconciliation Magick Done The Right Way by Tuesday Thomas - The Undefined Witch
















The above are an amalgamation of the many infidelity/reconciliation related Asks I receive on a monthly basis. Reconciliation spells are probably my most requested, and each time one of these finds its way to my inbox, my heart sinks a little. Not because I’m tired of receiving the same requests over and over – far from it. They make me sad because, as an empath I feel the true depths of the pain the querents are experiencing; and as a witch, I know how complex reconciliation spells can be. As a fellow human? Well, I’ve been on this planet long enough, and experienced enough trauma, to recognise a sad, but valid truism. A spell to get your ex back may seem like your only option, but consider this:


As soon as a person forgives a partner who has cheated or abandoned them, they are letting them know that this behaviour is acceptable.


Are Reconciliation Spells Worth It?


I know this won’t be an especially palateable opinion. I also know there are many, MANY things we tell ourselves in this situation to make the unpalateable more acceptable. Under times of great emotional upheaval, it is amazing what humans want to believe, and I count myself among them.


The unexpected ending of a relationship is a soul destroying experience. It is a grieving process – grief for the loss of the life you thought you had, and the loss of what might have been. Often this is made even more confusing by the fact that you find yourself grieving for a person who seemingly no longer exists. The partner you knew and loved would NEVER behave like this towards you. Where did they go?


Did your partner leave you for somebody else? Before starting any reconciliation work, go HERE.



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Then comes the denial. That just isn’t in my partner’s nature. It must be another woman weaving a seductive web around them, getting inside their head and manipulating them. It must be another man charming them with a whirlwind romance and promises of the good life.  It must be their friends/family/colleagues putting the boot in. The partner who left quickly becomes a victim of circumstance and definitely not accountable for their actions.


It is true that there are many manipulative skanks and dirty dogs out there. I’m regularly baffled by the amount of people who seem to believe that somebody in a relationship is fair game rather than off limits. It is, however, very important to remember this: nobody cheats or leaves unwillingly. It doesn’t matter how much they regret it afterwards or how extenuating the circumstances, there is always a moment in time when that decision is made.


Have a burning question? Have a look at my Ask A Witch section, or Contact me HERE.


So where does this leave the partner who was cheated on or abandoned? Some have the strength to pick themselves up, dust themselves down and call it a lucky escape. But what if, for whatever reason, you aren’t able to simply walk away without looking back?  Sometimes the urge to have everything ‘back to normal’ is just too strong to ignore, and people are willing to do whatever it takes to achieve it. This is when many turn to reconciliation spells.


Before Conducting A Spell To Get Your Ex Back


Before deciding on a spell to get your ex back, I would always advise taking a step back to really consider the ramifications. When we set reconciliation spells in motion, it means we must be prepared to forgive whatever was done to us, draw a line under it and move on. Sounds easy enough, but have you ever tried to forgive a person who isn’t actually sorry? That’s a whole different ball game.


Another consideration is, how will life look for you when they return? Forgiving a fairly catastrophic breach of trust brings further ramifications. What a person says and does are often at odds with each other. You can insist it is unacceptable all the live long day, but by letting them back in, your actions say differently.


Rebuilding trust is a long, slow process. Will you be forever wondering who he or she is texting? What if they are home late? Or want to go out with their friends? Will you have an open phone policy? Will you share passwords? Will the other person be prepared to do whatever needs to be done to make it work?


Reconciliation Spells And Free Will


The truth is, that all of the above hinges on how much the cheating party wants to make things right. And that will only ever be the case if they have returned voluntarily. It all boils down to that age-old debate within spell casting circles: Is it ever ok to mess with free will?


The wiccans adhere to a rede which says ‘An It Harm None, Do What Thou Wilt.’ For them, it is a cut and dried no, you never perform rituals against another person’s wishes, as it could cause them harm, even unintentionally. But what about the non wiccans among us? Are we prepared to go there? For me, it just isn’t that black and white. One of the key points to conducting a successful spell is to create a channel for your magick to flow through. It’s like swimming with instead of against the tide, you need to do your bit to help it along in the mundane world also. In that respect, reconciliation spells to force a lover to return against their will are always much harder to accomplish. They are also less likely to last for any substantial period of time.


Why didn’t my spell work? Click here for Tuesday’s Top Tips on troubleshooting your magick.


Think about a child who is forced to apologise. They will say what needs to be said to get you off their back, but do they actually mean it? More importantly, has you imposing your will over theirs taught them the error of their ways? Or has it just taught them not to get caught next time? Now think about the child who feels genuine remorse and apologises of their own volition. It’s that much more heartfelt, and chances are, the lesson has been learned.


This is why reconciliation spells are so complex. There is no one size fits all, and a spell to get your ex back needs to be as unique as your circumstances in order to give it the best chance of working. In order to decide which way to go, you need to be able to unpick what went wrong, and be as honest with yourself as you possibly can be.


Strategy For A Spell To Get Your Ex Back


So, enough waffling about ethics. You’ve come this far in the article and now you want the good stuff. What is a spell to get your ex back, done the right way? Here is my secret: it’s about breaking it down into steps and working through them systematically.


Reconciliation Spells For If Your Ex Is Still Single


Your first step is to soften your ex’s feelings towards you with a jar spell, which can take a while. You could also work a Look Me Over or Follow Me Boy candle spell to try and capture his attention again. Next comes the spell to persuade them to initiate contact with you. In particularly stubborn cases you may need to conduct a Compelling or Commanding spell. Once all of this preparation has been done, you can work on reconciliation. At this stage, the Onion and Pin Spell would be a great way to proceed.


Long term, you will also need to establish what went wrong last time, and take steps to eradicate this, by magick or mundane means. You might also wish to consider a Fidelity Spell to prevent them from straying again, and potentially a Back Off Bitch’ ritual if another person was involved.



To learn how to use spell oils and powders in your rituals, have a look at this article



Reconciliation Spells For If Your Ex Is With Someone Else


This is always a tricky one. First you need to be prepared to take steps to split them up with a separation spell. Then work to keep them apart, first by a hot foot or drive away spell on the ‘other man/woman’ followed by regular cord cutting spells to break the bonds between them. Only after this is completed is there any point in following the steps above.


That’s a whole lot of effort and energy you are pouring into someone who isn’t doing the same for you.


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At the end of the day, only you can know if this person is worth it. If you believe that to be the case, you now have the tools to put together a kick ass strategy to get them back in your life. If you aren’t 100% sure however, think about this. You could work any number of rituals with less effort, a greater likelihood of success and a more positive outcome, by choosing to move on and open yourself up to the possibility of new love, with someone who isn’t going to break your heart.



I’d love to hear your thoughts on reconciliation spells. Are you for or against them? Perhaps you did a spell to get your ex back? How did you get on? Leave a comment below.

13 thoughts on “Spell To Get Your Ex Back – The Truth About Reconciliation Spells

  1. Johanne says:

    Hi Tuesday, I am new to your site and am looking for a strong separation spell. A “courage” spell may also be helpful? Let me know if you can help me find that. Thank you.

  2. Patrick D Moore says:

    My situation is complex my ex texted me after a great weekend that she was not ready for a relationship this is after 6 months of what felt like the greatest love of my life when I quesstioned her she said that a 19 year relationship of abuse that she had been in had been resurfacing and that she needed time to sort that out I’m left with many questions and I’m heartbroken

  3. Carrie Noworolnik says:

    I knew a guy for 3 weeks but when we met we had an instant connection. Both of us were completely enamoured with each other immediately. He said he was falling for me within the first week and shared all kinds of personal information. Then after 3 weeks we spent the night together (not the first time we had sex just spent the night.). After that he got more distant and a few days later he broke up with me over text saying that I was great and didn’t do anything wrong but our time together was too consuming and he got into trouble at work. Then he said I was pushing too hard too fast even though he really was the one driving it as I am normally very guarded because I lost my husband 5 years ago. I never heard from this guy again and I’m devastated! I tried contacting him in various ways which probably pushed him away further. How can he go from gushing over me and calling or texting me constantly to getting freaked out and never talking to me again? We were so there! There were no issues. No fighting. No accusations. No demands. He just got spooked and wanted out. How can I get a switch flipped in his head to realize we are meant to be together? I’m seeing signs everywhere! A car like his (which isn’t a common car) everywhere I look. I tried online dating and every other guy I match with has his name. I hear songs that remind me of him at the gym or in a friend’s car. We both felt an instant connection the moment we met. I don’t get it!

  4. Barbara Cantlin Howard says:

    I actually did a binding spell on my husband after he filed for divorce. Not only did he come back to me, but he canceled the divorce in front of the judge. Now I’m working on a spell to get his smother to move away and leave us alone.

  5. Herman Guerrero says:

    I believe in reconciliation spells because there are always mitigating circumstances, outside interferences, and predators who always seem to find the married woman with marital problems when they are at their weakest, and you must also look at your part in it, better a reconciliation spell then the alternatives I have read and heard of crimes of passion where many a stories of men who chose to mess with a married woman and ended up in the cemetery. Some men and woman out there are savages and hold nothing sacred.

    So yes reconciliation spells and the power of magic works for me. . . . .

  6. Jodi says:

    Great advice. Free will. I always say you cant make someone love you. As much as I want him back. Im better off without him.

  7. Devean Ogletree says:

    How can u help me get me the love of my life back? We been together for 11 years. I took care of her when she didn’t have nothing. She ask me to change my life and I did I got a job baptized even stop hurting.

  8. April says:

    I need to know if my ex is truly my soulmate and if I should try to get him back. It’s been a year and he won’t talk to me or anything. We were together for over 11 years.

  9. Tracy Semonik says:

    I’ve done reconciliation spells before and the partner always comes back to me or the person who they left… eventually. Maybe years later. Often, someone bad leaves a person because they don’t want to taint the good person with their awfulness. In this last case, for me, my ex had perpetrated fraud long ago and his house of cards was falling and he didn’t want me involved at all. He’s in jail now. In other cases, exes I’ve brought back to friends have been deadbeat spouses, ones who resort to physical violence and ones who bring multiple small children from other relationships into home after home after home. Reconciliation spells bring relationships back, but they bring the problems that came with them and just amplify them. For this reason, before you do ANY reconciliation work, I’d do 3 things 1. a reading. 2. a spell to improve YOURSELF. 3. a spell to resolve the situation that occurred. Above all, do NOT try to get back together in order to get revenge on them. Just do the revenge work and trust the universe will take care of it. And one more thing: there are spells called Intranquil spirit spells. Those spells and love spells don’t mix. Heed everyone’s warnings and don’t use them. In MY case the guy came back, and threatened to kill me once we lived together. It was not love on his end like it was on mine. Accept things like this and move on. Sometimes the best revenge really IS to live better. Stay in touch with a lost love, and sometimes they see how well you’re doing, and they’ll want to improve themselves FOR YOU.

Talk to me 😊

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